"Live my life, life of confusion, of my inner soul." -Me

Who Am I?

Who am I but a another soul.
A soul of hate.
A soul of lost.
Lost for words.
Words no cares.
Cares about me.
Cares about my feelings.
Feelings toward my past.
My future.
Future that will never come.
Future that will define death.
Who am I but another soul.Soul of confusion.
Confusion of who I really am.
Now and then.

Silent Lost

I hear nothing.
Feel nothing.
Nothing my heart.
My soul. My mind.
I cringe in pian to try.
Try and figure out.
Who I am.
What Iam.
Where I belong.
To whom I belong.
Why such silent lost?
Silent lost of hope.
Hope for someone to explain.
Explain why Iam here.
Here on this ground.
This pitiful, but holy ground.
Ground of God and his savors.
Why the silent lost?
To tell me.
About who I was.
Who Iam suppose to be.
But no.
The silent lost of hope.
To find my true self.
Will never come by.

Pages of Life

I open up a book.
And pray to God for answers.
Answers to my prays.
Prays of identifacation.
Of myself.
Myself and my family.
Family I never seen.
Heard.
I open up a book.
And pray to God for hope.
Hope to find my inner soul.
Soul of love. Warmth.
These pages I want them to tell.
Tell me my past life.
The life I had.
Had with love ones.
Had without sorrow.
Without pain.
i want these pages to breeze.
Breeze by the words.
They used upon me.
Upon my beauty.
These pages will wither out.
Wither and burn.
Without scripiting.
The life I had.

©d3fin3x

Only Death

As the tears roll off my face.
The thundering splashe.s
Match the beat
Of my heart
It slows down and so does the rain.
I pull myself together thinking of the
fun we had but it still hurts on the inside.
Remembering your face accelerates my
heartbeat and the tears begin to flow
once again.
I cry out asking for an end to this infernal
aching.
But no one hears me.
As I stare into the raging fires of the sun.
I realize that only Death can stop my pain now.

-Nat-

When Death Comes

I wonder when Death is coming for me.
I would welcome him into my dwelling and wrestle him.
Not for want of Life but for the joy of a playmate
whom I definitely cannot beat.
The feeling when fighting a losing battle against his
cold soul would light me on Fire.
Granting my wish to glow just one day of my life
even if I'm on Death's wonderful bed.

-Nat-

 What is Death?

What is death but the end of journay.
End of the journay I despised.
Despised because of my own pain.
Pain I created. Pain I beared.
What is death but the end of time.
End of time I have wasted.
Wasted on mankind. Wasted on unwanted love.
What is death but the end of pain.
End of torture. End of love.
End of this disgraceful life.

Death is Joy

Death is cruel.
Cruel and hurtful.
Hurtful to ones who see it.
Ones who experience it.
Experience the lost of life.
Lost of mankind.
Lost of love.
Love from your heart.
Heart of death,
Death is not cruel.
Too me.
Death is Joy.

Eyes of Death

Everytime these eyes close.
Close to dream.
Dream about death,
Dream about how it would be good.
To get out of this.
This disgraceful.
This pitiful.
Life.
Life of a depression.
A depression in eyes.
Depression in the soul.
The eyes of death.
Will soon close.

©d3fin3x

"I am an immortal eternally in love with a dead soul." -Nate

Depression

I quietly weep regained mass my dry tears.
In my unseeing eyes.
The fluids in I clamp down my body my lids,
No longer able forcing myself to support to ignore my leaking orbs.
The descent of scorching sands my tears.
Sting my flesh though my mind as the time wanders aimlessly lazily shuffles through the horribly negative along aspects of my existence, teasing me a single thought and my view sticks to my concentration that life like some blood thirsty is just one tick, long, depressing clinging to a meal.
Chore even if my life's that I'd rather termination is not have been
achieved by my own assigned.
Wretched hands, I gaze skyward what punishment not to admire inflicted beyond that careless fireball, the grave which secretly delights could compare in frying my retina, with the Personal Hell but to blink away my tortured soul the fresh salt-water has painstakingly collections learned that have slowly to love.
And to hate.

-Nate-

Voice of A Soul

Your soul used to whisper in my ear at night.
"You and I will never die, but take your time and savor the love anyway."
And savor I did.
Every waking moment that I wasn't in your presence.
I thought of you.
But then one night your soul didn't come to me.
I waited for days, weeks.
But he didn't come back for months.
So I grew anxious.
One night I heard him again and was so happy for his return that I couldn't believe what he said.
"The burden of the world is once again upon your shoulders."
Was his message and his melodious voice never kissed my ears again.

-Nate-

Selfish

Now that I know. What I really am.
I want to change. Change the future.
As well for the past. When I need
someone I will not ask for them.
Iam no longer.
s-e-l-f-i-s-h-.
Toward love.

Death of Mankind

I dearly hope from the bottom of my heart.
Dearly hope for mankind to die.
Die out for ever.
Die out and be sent to the devil.
To the devil they will go.
Go to the suffer.
The pain. The sorrow.
I had beared.

The Defination

The eyes that tear to bits.
To bits they will be.
They will be the eyes of pain.
Pain throbbing from the body.
The body is covered with emotions.
Emotions that will last forever.
Forever in the depression.
The depression of me.
Me, the defination.
Of depression.

©d3fin3x